The sixty-two-year-old woman was lonely and just sat daily at her laptop, leafing through the pages. The room was untidy, despite the fact that it was past noon, the curtains were drawn, and the darkness reigned.
Once upon a time this woman had been beautiful; now the years had long since done their work, but she continued to young herself, and was firmly convinced that she was still a beauty. Her bad habits had left an imprint on her teeth, her wrinkles, her unpainted gray hair, her overgrown eyebrows – it was all untidy, but it seemed to her that if she could just take a little time to work on herself, she would shine again.
However, what a naive delusion!
This elderly woman remembered well when she got married at the age of 18 and immediately gave birth to her first child. But life didn’t work out: her husband demanded that she look for a job, she had to take care of the child, and in two years she was divorced.
She dreamed of becoming an actress and even was accepted to the theatrical school, but it turned out that she had to study there, and acting is “hard bread”, so she was expelled from the second year for multiple absences and underachievement. But she stayed in the theatrical circle, finding a job as a maid in the theater, but most importantly, she was about bohemia.
She went to parties where you could meet some actor or musician and think she had something to do with all those premieres, full houses, shootings, concerts. She tried to find herself a creative husband, from that very place. She sent her son to his parents long ago so he wouldn’t get in the way. And a man was found. He wore a French beret, tied his scarf in Italian, beautifully quoted Shakespeare, and passionately talked about how he would write an opera in the postmodern style.
Then the second child came along. But the partying from their communal apartment did not go anywhere: tobacco smoke hung like a veil over the baby’s crib, the baby could not sleep to the endless poems and sings, sounding loud and constantly screaming, and she had to take him in her arms and sit in the kitchen while her creative husband composed that very opera.
The life of two failed actors is “not sugar”. There was no money, no food, no normal clothes and toys for her son.
Not withstanding such a life, she decided to leave her second husband as well, leaving him with the child.
She got a job at a school for a paltry salary as a drama club leader. Fortunately, the alimony for her first son was decent and she could afford a lot. The work fascinated her: students looked into her mouth when she read her monologues, she felt like a director and staged Shakespeare and Goethe, bathed in the attention of the audience and felt like a prima donna. She especially liked that all the high school students were in love with her and she graciously accepted their signs of attention.
One day her ex-boyfriend tracked her down and told her that their son was very sick and needed an operation and asked for money:
– “What money? What are you talking about?”, she shouted into the phone, wringing her hands. “I’m raising one child, and you’re raising another”.
Then she accidentally got pregnant by one of her graduates (a young guy with great promise). The difference of 18 years did not embarrass her at all. When her belly began to show, she remarried under pressure from her parents.
And just before the birth of her third son she received a message that her second husband had died. But she took the news without emotion. She did not even remember his face, she did not have any pictures of him. She had long forgotten him.
When the third boy was born, and her new husband was trying to finish college, the alimony from a previous marriage and her mother’s pension were the only sources of income for this strange family. But mom didn’t live long. She died about a year later, after which this woman’s life became even worse.
And then it would seem that she would have to pull herself together, finally grow up and take responsibility for her life. But this woman decided to go the old way.
She forced her husband to drop out of college and go to work (explaining that she could not work herself – she had children). And then, when her oldest son turned 15, she suddenly had a conversation with him: “Son, studying is certainly a good thing, but we need the money”. After that her son went to work, although he don’t want it and was very praised at school. “That’s okay, he’ll learn later”, she thought.
Problems began not only with money. Her current, third husband started coming home drunk more and more often, staying late at work, sometimes not even staying home at night, and it became known that he was having an affair on the side.
For a long time she pretended not to notice anything, crying into her pillow and agonizing over the question: “What was it all for?”. And so when their old house fell under the “dilapidated housing” program, and she received a comfortable apartment in the downtown, she quickly divorced and without a second of doubt arranged a “drama with exposure”, packed her things and abandoned her now ex-husband to the mercy of fate.
It is in this apartment that she now spends her time alone. All day long she played all kinds of online games, from farming to flirting. The children stopped communicating with her, one was tired of the constant demands for money, the other son was forbidden by his wife to communicate with his mother, the third was constantly busy. She is poor, alone, has no job and no family.
At the same time she had millions in game accounts. In “flirting game” she was one of the most desirable conversationalists, with a picture of a young Hollywood actress on her avatar. She would spend 18 hours a day at her laptop, then forget herself with a short nap and rush off again into the world of virtual wealth, luxury, and male attention.
Life has taught this woman nothing. But worse than that, she is angry at the world because she feels she has not been treated fairly. She does not want to understand the true nature of her problems. And the key is her selfishness and emptiness inside.
If there are similar people around you, beware! Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do to help. And it’s better to keep away from them, because it was proven long ago that emptiness (like darkness) tends to absorb all the good and kind.